@Sudsinabucket I read what you've written so far and it's a good story! Keep going! I feel that if you did a "Second Draft" (where you go back through yourself for typos, tense and inconsistencies) it would make it even better. A friend of mine is a published author and he tries to give me advice all the time. I take what he says with a pinch of salt as, yes, he has co-authored two books, but it doesn't make everything he says gospel. Anyways, one of the things he recommended (and is apparently standard practice in the writing world) is to do Draft 1, then re-read yourself and correct anything you see in Draft 2 and then farm out the story to beta readers. I found the idea of a second draft helpful. But don't let this change your creative impulse. I would only recommend using it to make sure that your concept of the story was coming across to the reader. Changes to that are valuable as it makes a clean transmission from your idea to their mind. Anything else starts to get opinionated. I've read at least 3 pro writers (best one being Brandon Sanderson) talking about how they had stories rejected by editors saying that they were basically crap which ended up being bestsellers. So, essentially, KEEP GOING!